I am going to transcribe a portion of a book that I am reading, for the second time (it is just that important, in my opinion), and it is my prayer that you would go out and purchase this book.
'The Silence of Adam' by Dr. Larry Crabb
Taken from Chapter 9 'The Way Unmanly Men Relate'
No man can be happy without living out the call to make visible that which is hard to see about God. Happiness comes for a man when he shows, by his life, that God is always moving, is never stopped by darkness, and is continually up to something good, no matter how bad things may appear.
Men are called to hover over darkness, to enter the mystery of relationships until they are humbled enough to trust God, and then to act to further God's purposes. That action, by the way, will fall flat with a loud thud unless God is in it. Most men never even think like this; they never give their call from God a moment's thought. And not even the best man lives out his manhood completely.
If it is true that no man can be completely happy without perfectly honoring God's call to be a man, then it follows that no man on earth is completely happy. Every one of us struggles with some measure of unhappiness, some experience of internal emptiness and restless dissatisfaction, that our Creator never intended us to endure.
From deep within our hearts, in those places of our being that we do not understand, a yearning emerges. It is a desperate longing for a response, a vacuum that needs o be filled. It is also an angry turbulence that won't let us sit still. To at least some degree, every man knows that he is not fully happy. And when his unfulfilled desires surface into the light of day, he is confronted with the essential choice of human existence: to trust God or not trust him, to light his own fires or rely on the name of the Lord.
If he trusts God, the unhappiness (which must continue till death) is surrounded by hope, by acceptance, by meaning in spite of imperfection. And he is empowered to move well. That brings joy.
If he refuses to trust, the unhappiness within him becomes his most compelling problem. He must find some way to deal with it.
We must understand a simple principle: every man is moving. Movement defines a man's existence. But all movement is not good. Therefore, when a man is not moving as he should, he will move in ways he should not. When good movement stops, bad movement begins. Good movement is movement through personal unhappiness towards God. Bad movement is movement aimed at nothing higher than relieving personal unhappiness.
Because men, like women, are fundamentally relational beings, all movement will be seen most clearly in the way a man relates. A man will either call forth life and beauty in the people he knows or he will destroy that same life and beauty. A man's effect on others may be imperceptible or dramatic, but it is there. No interaction of more than a few seconds, no conversation beyond the most casual, leaves the other person unchanged.
Manly men release others from their control and encourage them with their influence. They touch their wives, children, and friends in sensitive ways that free them to struggle with their loneliness and selfishness and pain. Manly men nudge their family and friends to the same crossroads where they, as men, have found that trust or unbelief must be chosen.
Unmanly men require their friends and family to meet their demands. Men who move with control, anger, and terror deaden others into conformity or incite them to self-preserving rebellion.
I pray this excerpt awakens that part of you, my Brother, that has been SCREAMING to be recognized. Please, go get this book. I know that it will bless you, your wife, child(ren), family and friends, who all have been anticipating the REAL you to come forth.
Holla,
Yer Brova Catalyst
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